Fall 2016, I watched a few Andy Stanley sermons that were streaming on Netflix. In one of the sermons he said, although you may know better, that doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll do better. You have to make an effort to change your ways.
When you’re waiting, you have to be intentional about setting boundaries. This can be uncomfortable if you haven’t set these kinds of boundaries before. When you set boundaries while you wait, you choose you and If you haven’t been choosing you, it will be difficult to begin to.
Choosing you means not letting things go too far or not having someone over too late. It means waiting awhile. It means delayed gratification.
It means changing your mindset.
What does intimacy look like while you’re waiting? Are you prepared to remind her/him of your boundaries?
In some cases, couples don’t share hotel rooms. They may not kiss or touch very much or they may do all of the above and be fine. It comes down to knowing yourself and your partner.
Maybe you have self-control and can manage intimate moments or maybe you need the other person to have more self-control.
Whatever the case may be, you have to know you and know when to say good night or good-day. Waiting isn’t easy but it creates more opportunities to get to know someone outside of the physical.
So now that you know better, do better.
Don’t let lust get in the way of finding out if you have something that will be long-lasting. Doing better will help you make better decisions. It will also keep you from going too far too fast and getting hurt. Trust me – setting boundaries has kept me from a world of hurt.
It also helped me figure out who was really for me. You never know, setting boundaries and putting you first might lead you to the partner your heart desires.
There’s someone out there who knows your worth. You just have to know it first.